Thursday, March 4, 2010

I am an idiot. A Card Carrying, Grade "A" IDIOT..

Look,, you're not supposed to nod your head in agreement and hollar "AMEN" when someone makes a statement like that. It's just rude. Haven't you heard the old adage: if you don't have anything nice to say-- I mean read-- I mean assimilate in head movements and comment about--whatever,,,, you get the point,, don't make me contact parents here, I am sure they will be on MY side as I will offer homemade cookies and Vodka in lieu of their support.

Not every one's frontal lobe is wired seamlessly to make decisions like yours is, and that's why I am so lucky to know you!! But you didn't help with this decision, so I am a bit perturbed at you, which could easily be forgiven if you bring homemade cookies and Vodka to your parents after I call them and turn them against you (see how that works).

http://www.neurosciencemarketing.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/brain-argument.jpg

So now I am thinking: I need to share with you my idiotic decision!

But then I had a second line of thought: Maybe you should guess!!

It would be fun and possibly dangerous,, but mostly fun and engaging, I think, but I ramble sometimes when I think,,,, so, who really knows, hey Winn Dixie has chicken on sale, but I hate cooking so why do I care,, Oh yeah I have children to feed, that's why,,,,,,wonder if you can glaze chicken with green Jello? Hmmmmm,, wonder why no one ever just drinks Jello water,,,, or do they???????.........geesh.........make it stop........I hate thinking about such deep things........

So this will be a multiple answer question. But here's the trick. A part of each answer MAY be true...or none...or maybe more than one is...

So give it a try and string together my profession of idiocy while not being judgemental of stupid people but rather loving their quirks.....

The Seductress is a raging IDIOT because:

A. She fell for McDonald's evil "The McRib is BACK" propaganda last night and now not only feels like she ate toxic waste but on the way home, got in a minor fender bender because she was looking for a CD..

B. She got another tattoo, this one is of a cell phone with a "pipe" picture on it, and then bought a treadmill and already has utilized it by hanging clothes on her new closet outside a closet.

C. She let her kids buy the "KESHA" CD and now has suicidal tendencies and slurs her words.

D. She took a job at Walmart to be close to the elderly Walmart greeters and now hearts mullets and slim-jims!!

E. She got a puppy and named it "Peeve" and now has one more pet peeve to blog about!

F. This would be too many choices and she should keep it simple

G. Write your own,, be gentle,, and clean,, your parents are reading remember they heart me now and are not so happy with you!!!

16 Seducing Deductions:

Mike Minzes said...

What, no hint??

Ok, I say "A"...but only because I would fall for it too HA

Blasé said...

I thought Winn Dixie went out of business???

#B please tell me you're just kidding.

The Savage said...

x) you secretly fell in lust with me only to find out I don't live anywhere near you....

You still have Mc'Rib? Thats almost cause enough for me to move....

julie said...

I don't think you are a raging idiot, because I can actually identify with some of it. The McRib for one, but I still haven't had it.
I have some pretty crazy thoughts in my head to. You are a delight...julie

The Invisible Seductress said...

Reallive-No hints..wink...McRibs r tempting!!!

Blase-laughing...maybe I am that stupid *shrugs* -I have WD in my neighborhood--hate that store!!

Savage-still falling!! wink McRib is here now!!!!!

Julie-thanks!!! delight/insanity/idiot it all works so well together!! laughing..so glad to have met you!!!

Anonymous said...

Winn - Dixie, the beef people. Only in the south. Needs you to fill out your "Ho" paper work and return it quickly please. *muah*

Heff said...

I have nothing to add, I just desperately want a McRib !

Slyde said...

PLEASE PLEASE let the mcrib really be back!

i used to love that toxic bit of swill...

The Invisible Seductress said...

McRib why doest thou tepmt us so??? With compacted meat byproducts formed in the shape of a zither, sub-par BBQ sauce and a delicate smattering of onions, surely you know your own strength. And McDonalds--you should be ashamed danglinigg it in from of us for limited periods and then taking it away....tsk tsk...But is that why I am an idiot? Not sure...

Bama-Is this for pre-approval purposes? You know,, the people here don't know what you're talking about and now are thinking: Hmmmm,, say it isn't so Seductress--a life of crime????!!! Nooooooooo!!! *laughing*

Heff-will send.....
Slyde-It is here....I heart toxic bits of swill!!

Anonymous said...

Oh no no no, you have been pre approved, this is just to go into the personnel file. ;)

me said...

i should have never left florida.....

The Invisible Seductress said...

These are not good guesses by the way....wink

Bama- I see...Well then in THAT case...

Trey- Nope---ya shouldn't have!! ;)

mac said...

If your giving away puppies, I'll take the ones with the brown nose.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I like the pet peeve theme, and I'll take an extra puppy myself.
Hugs,
Robyn
PS You are NOT an idiot. Then again, if it was the McRibs.. Just kidding, hon.

The Invisible Seductress said...

Mac-Little brown noses are the best!!
RR-laughing--you must be the only McRib denier!

*will post answer(s) on Monday..*

HUGS!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

After I swallow some fast food crap, the guilty feelings sweep over me bad, then I get willpower back--sure right after eating that stuff...

Secretia

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