Thursday, July 8, 2010

A Jello Vat Party Invitation for YOU!!!!!!


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So then I picked her up with my MIND POWERS,,
and SHOOK 'er like a DOG!!!

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WILD AND CRAZY Pictures, Images and Photos


I have decided that I need to take an entirely different turn in my career... For ALAS my dear readers,, I was NOT made to sit behind a desk.. For,,, I was created.................

TO CREATE!!!!!!!!

A-Haaaaaa......Did you NOT see the sky open up and hear the chorus of angels sing as I proclaimed my ultimate calling in this world? Did you NOT feel the gasp of disappointment from the belly of the business world as they realize they might lose my brilliance??

I now stand precariously perched upon the top of my poorly constructed computer desk and proclaim THIS day... as the day of FREEDOM!!

THIS is an example of the dance that goes along with standing precariously perched upon the top of my poorly constructed computer desk as I am proclaiming THIS day... as the day of FREEDOM!!

happy dance Pictures, Images and Photos

Ah YES!!

The Precariously Perched Happy Dance of Proclaimed Freedom..

It is a Finely Orchestrated

Neon Lighted

Fantastically, Sexy, Sexy Number!!!

(and you thought it was going to be silly,, pshaw!!)

But what does this all mean, Seductress?? You ask,, as you move to the edge of your seat and wait for a well thought out and perfectly sane response from me (really,, you expect sane??)..

But no,,, INSTEAD,,,, I give you confetti falling from the ceiling and Champagne toasts at Midnight or whatever time I decide that we should sit together in the very large vat of Green Jello and try to catch the Green Olives in our mouths that we have been taking turns launching at each other between 'bouts of singing the song about our house being a very, very, very, fine house..

You do KNOW that song don't you?? It saddens me to say that if you don't,, I may not be able to invite you into the very large vat of Green Jello and you may have to merely sit BY the vat and look in longingly whilst all of us that DO know "the very, very, very, fine house" song celebrate with reckless abandon while floating on giant pineapple rings!!

Perhaps you should run off to YouTube and look that song up because I am telling you.....

.... A good time will be had by all who enter the vat.

I'll wait for you,, because it does really take a surprisingly long period of time for a very large vat of Green Jello to congeal to the perfect floating on a pineapple consistency.

lime green jello Pictures, Images and Photos

I have exasperated my brain cells for now and will have to come back to enlighten you on my plan to take over the world whilst we are IN the vat. I deduce that you will not think it is any big deal but would like to support me anyway by sitting in the vat on a pineapple ring
WITH ME
because you are good people and feel that friends with mental disabilities (as myself) must really be supported (or at least monitored closely around Jello)...

Plus,, we have some time because I still need to run to Winn Dixie and get even more Jello and a BIGGER vat for when the rest of you learn "the very,very,very fine house song". I have decided to add to the link to the bottom of this post for you so that you can quickly RSVP back to me and attend my celebration inside the vat instead of whimpering by the side of it..
(...... because I heart you and think you would look sexy on a pineapple ring!)


Bikini tops and Green Thongs WILL be provided for your convenience. Men should be aware that the "Green Thong" is not an optional apparel choice,, IT IS MANDATORY.

Unless of course you own one of these it is approved:

Look At Me, High 5 Pictures, Images and Photos

As it already comes in the required Jello Green hue and may offer a tad more coverage for those of you who feel the need to be a bit more modest and do not want to be openly ogled by the women floaters in the Jello vat (shoes and sunglasses are to be left at the side of the Jello vat as I have class and a reputation of extreme luxury to uphold.)

You do plan on RSVP-ing don't you??? I do hope so!!! I was wondering if you could be so kind as to bring along a bushel or so of Circus Peanuts...

AND

.... a very low tolerance for sanity at any level..

Please study:

9 Seducing Deductions:

Sir Thomas said...

ok hold me a spot.... i'm coming for sure and for the record I know the song you are talking about and I'm humming it as I type this.....

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Damn girl, you so crazy. Only out of the depths of your dispair could you come up with a lime jello and pinapple sex tournament. This is why I loves ya.

mac said...

CS&N have some of the finest harmonies ever recorded (Even better when Y was with them) !

It sounds fun, as long as no one tries to put lettuce in the jello.

Powdered Toast Man said...

I would love to come but I once had a traumatic experience with a vat of red jell-o when I was 7. I almost drowned.

I love your writing so much. You should have 1000 followers by now.

Would you like to guest post on Just the Cheese some time?

The Invisible Seductress said...

Sir- Which one you wearing?? wink....smile..grrrr

Cal- Loves ya back...Lime Jello heals all..and sex... well I don't have to go there,,and I haven't since 1902...sigh...sob..sniffle..snort

Mac- No lettuce..I swear!! Who the hell started that anyway..hmmpf (hugs)

PTM- If it were GREEN Jello it would have caressed you romantically and NOT tried to kill you!!! You can't trust any other Jello,, I swear... I would love to guest, but I'm not worthy...I'm not worthy...(bowing in reverence)

Heff said...

Eeewwww. I LOATHE Circus Peanuts...and LOVE my desk job, lol.

Heff said...

I SUPPOSE I could have WASHED it first, lol !

http://heffsbarandgrill.blogspot.com/2008/02/from-vault.html

1manview said...

I hope somebody is holding the end of that rope that's tied to your leg, because yo have lost it... LOL..
Oh by the way, have a great weekend...

Boonsong said...

Very amusing post, and I love the video, "our house". Thanks.

All the best, Boonsong

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