You ARE the father!!I started on my diet again. You know the one,, copious amounts of big fat Green Olives,, getting my exercise by sucking the pimento out first and wishing I had vodka. I am surprised Hollywood has not stolen this yet. On day 7,, I can have unlimited sugar free Green Jello (luckily,, I have a vat of it).. The exercising is also amped up then by sucking the Green Jello through a small straw..
It's simple,, dieting sucks,, so why not suck while dieting..
No wait.. OMG.. I know that most of you,, as myself,, are as pure as the driven snow (and also do not eat the yellow snow,, because you are intelligent like that..)
But,, I can only assume that SOME of you are thinking naughty things about my first paragraph,, in reference to the sucking..
I must only discipline you as I have been disciplined in the past..
With a firm spanking..
No wait.. OMG.. Some of you would LIKE that TOO!!
Dammit.. I live in a world of untainted goodness and wholesome hand holding on a front porch swing with a father switching the lights off and on if the boy looks impetuous (my boys always looked impetuous)..
I do not understand your world of sex and frivolity..
Perhaps I shall simply accept you for the morally Loosey,, Goosey person that you are and move on in this post..
I also have purchased a shake weight to help with arm toning.. (Heff introduced it to me,, because he cares about women's health issues..)
Check it out:
Really,, SEX,, Again??!!
I think I am going to need to take some "alone time" and think about the future of our friendship..
Oh,, Come ON!! Stop looking at me as if I am your sex cupcake!!
Cupcakes are sweet and innocent and immune to the sexual tarnishing of your world..
Why do I even try???