Friday, July 9, 2010

Diets and your Dirty, Dirty minds.. tssk, tssk for shame!!!

Diet coke Bacon Pictures, Images and Photos
Hells Yes!!!


Michelin Man,,
You ARE the father!!

I started on my diet again. You know the one,, copious amounts of big fat Green Olives,, getting my exercise by sucking the pimento out first and wishing I had vodka. I am surprised Hollywood has not stolen this yet. On day 7,, I can have unlimited sugar free Green Jello (luckily,, I have a vat of it).. The exercising is also amped up then by sucking the Green Jello through a small straw..

It's simple,, dieting sucks,, so why not suck while dieting..

No wait.. OMG.. I know that most of you,, as myself,, are as pure as the driven snow (and also do not eat the yellow snow,, because you are intelligent like that..)

But,, I can only assume that SOME of you are thinking naughty things about my first paragraph,, in reference to the sucking..

I must only discipline you as I have been disciplined in the past..

With a firm spanking..

No wait.. OMG.. Some of you would LIKE that TOO!!

sweet couple Pictures, Images and Photos

Dammit.. I live in a world of untainted goodness and wholesome hand holding on a front porch swing with a father switching the lights off and on if the boy looks impetuous (my boys always looked impetuous)..

I do not understand your world of sex and frivolity..

Perhaps I shall simply accept you for the morally Loosey,, Goosey person that you are and move on in this post..

I also have purchased a shake weight to help with arm toning.. (Heff introduced it to me,, because he cares about women's health issues..)

Check it out:

Really,, SEX,, Again??!!

I think I am going to need to take some "alone time" and think about the future of our friendship..

Oh,, Come ON!! Stop looking at me as if I am your sex cupcake!!

Cupcakes are sweet and innocent and immune to the sexual tarnishing of your world..


Why do I even try???

13 Seducing Deductions:

TS Hendrik said...

That last cupcake one just confuses me. Why is there a cupcake standing there with a flower?

I wonder if diet bacon soda tastes good over eggs?

Dutch donut girl said...

Well my mind was full of innocent thoughts but they've suddenly turned naughty.

The Invisible Seductress said...

TS-I'm not really sure..It all confused me too,, but I think it is wrong somehow...all wrong..

DDG- Me too.. and why are the pastries having relations when I'm not right now?? This is all very upsetting....

mac said...

Dang, those cupcakes are twisted ! Fisting, really ???

Maybe the cupcake holding the flower was like This poor dog ?

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

That cupcake was only inserting creme filling...WHAT? I don't get all this potty talk.

Anonymous said...

"exercise by sucking the pimento out first and wishing I had vodka"

damn my middle name is olive didnt you know talk like that turns me on?

I would love to see you work out sometime with your shaker!!!

Cheeseboy said...

Have you seen the SNL commercial making fun of those shake weights? So funny.

That Diet Coke can at the top made me laugh and it made me laugh out loud.

Boonsong said...

Re, "I do not understand your world of sex and frivolity" - that's right not to have a capital F is it? I don't understand it either, but then I'm not expected to on account of me being a married man.

Have a nice day, Boonsong

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

I think the Michelin man started it all. He should NOT be reproducing.

I both love and hate the thought of Diet Coke with Bacon, so much so that I must try it.

I think the cupcake thing is all wrong too. There's no chocolate sauce.

Love ya, and thanks for spreading warmth and goodness, as always.

Crazy Brunette said...

God... So mant people have referred to me as 'pure as the driven snow' How did you know???

Dieting blows sweaty balls, but I heart you bitch!

Mike said...

Dieting blows (another sexual reference) and doesn't work. Just excercise with your shakey thang and boys will be interested in you.

Blasé said...

Awww, that's so sweet!

One Cupcake trying to help the other one stand back up. Did it fall down?

And then it pets the flower. Awwwww

The Invisible Seductress said...

Mac- That was a sad sad video... But maybe.. wink

Cal- I should have thought of that. He was merely being very meticulous at his job..

Sir- YouTube me...winks..not really.. hug

Cheeseboy-It did me too...and then I wanted some..

Boonsong- Laughing with you......

RRG- Maybe I should research more, there has got to be chocolate sauce. But Cal thinks it is being filled,, perhaps the filling is chocolate..This is wrong, and I am sorry..

CB- I knew you were...Look at that face!!! <3 you back... in a few pure ways...wink

Mike- My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...

Blase- This is a surprisingly sweet sweet comment about cupcake chivalry.. You're sweet compassionate sexy side is showing...And now I slap it...wink

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