4th Grade Love Tales

The sun was her backdrop, glowing and accentuating the perfect golden highlights in her hair that you could never get from a salon. The wind was her enemy, blowing the same highlighted tresses in her face causing noticeable irritation (that was surprisingly fun to watch). She cleared her mug from the strands and I caught first glimpse of the doe eyes I love so much and a smile that spoke novels.

DramaGirl was in love!

Awwwwwww

Those were her first words as she squirmed in the front seat of my car, itchy to share in an octave only a little girl can achieve. And then she was gone, she had forgotten something and ran to retrieve it. I watched her dart away, floating, legs in different directions without stumbling (a sure sign of love). I smiled and readied myself for the wall of words about to be built in the hurried pace of a girl in love. MsDebate sat in the back primed with cynicism and not scared to use it against her sisters joy.


Before Frosty nose fountain

DramaGirl: I have a boyfriend and LOOOOOVE him Mom!! I DO!!! I DOOOOO!!! (She said flailing excited speech spit at me)

Me: Tell me more!

MsDebate (jumping in): He doesn't want her to tell ANYBODY she's HIS girlfriend -AND- he gave her the wrong phone number! He's lame! (Spoken in monotone, bursting with sisterly love ,,,,almost)

DramaGirl: He doesn't want me to tell because his ex would find out,, he is KIND!! And he gave the wrong number because we were in a hurry..He loves me, I know it!!! (with the glow of a thousand halo's)

MsDebate (sarcastically): KIND,,, uh yes,,, KIND!!

DramaGirl: Yes KIND!!! (In that faltering strength voice)....His ex-girlfriend is BIG!!!
*****In WIDTH AND LENGTH!!****(a statement that TOTALLY cracked me up, obviously spoken because it's FCAT practice week and her mind is all mathy!!)..She would kill me or TORTURE me!!!! (she continued, thickening the plot)

MsDebate: What's her circumference? (because MsDebate's smart like that, and THAT was the perfect retort!!)

MsDebate (continuing,, not missing a beat): .....And you can't judge someone by the way they look!! See that guy in the messed up truck?? He could be dressed up to go to a rock concert,, he could be a ROCK STAR!! He could save people's lives!! (Each example was spoken with raised emphasis,, I was also glad "saving lives" was AFTER rock star!).

Me: Nodding in agreement (nothing really to add here)

DramaGirl: AND MOM'S THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND!! (no shit,, she said THAT!! I love my kids!!!!)

Me: I AM!!!!!! BOW TO ME LOWER CLASS CITIZENS,, BOW AND SERVE!!!!!!

...........laughter interrupts romance drama

It is then that I, Momma Bear, start grilling her on what it means to be "dating" someone. This goes on for a while until I deduce she understands. DramaGirl is still blessed with the sweetness of thinking dating someone means: knowing they are kind and maybe holding their hand at lunch (which is totally what I've missed in my last few relationships!!).

At this point I need to let her know that it IS possible he is not a "good" guy (judging by what he's done so far), but it's OK to give him a chance (And I think to myself that if he IS indeed a player, and makes her cry,,, after I get done with him she won't want him anyway.. but that's just a thought of course and most little boys actually like one sided paint ball fights,, right????)

We fixed DramaGirl up especially pretty this morning, flirty dress, cowboy boots, perfectly coiffed hair and a smidgen of mascara and clear lip gloss. She was also advised (by the Mayor of Singletown... "me") that maybe she should give him the following statement:

I like you -BUT- I do not have time for kindergarten games and you need to figure out what you want to do (and then smile THAT SMILE and walk away).

I am nervously awaiting the school bell today!!

Please enjoy this video of "Love Bites" by Def Leppard: