Tuesday, February 9, 2010

EBS

The following is a test of the

EMERGENCY BLOGGING SYSTEM.

The blogger on this site in voluntary cooperation with Local and Government guidelines has developed this test to alert you in case of an emergency. Had this been an ACTUAL emergency instructions would follow.

This is only a test.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeep-buzzzzzzzzzzz-waaaaaaaaaaaaank-errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

No wait----It IS an actual emergency!!!!

I care about your entertainment standards and have developed this system to protect you from a lame post. Today's post is a lame post. So please comment about something totally random and unconnected to this sucky day of Seductress writing. Just post the first thing that comes to your head, the wilder and most creative will win the contest. Yes,, I just made it a contest. I can do that because I used to own the world remember???? Wondering if I could borrow the dirty nuns from Robyn's contest (http://rawknrobynsgoneblogwild.blogspot.com)

Hmmmmm
..

MILLIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!! GERTIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!! I NEEEEED YOOOOOOUUUUUU!!!!!

Any way I do have random thoughts of naughtiness today!

Wanna hear them?? Of course you do!! Here I go:

Maybe I should lay gummy worms end to end from here to my neighbors house today and peck them all up like a fluffy chick after I knock on her door

or

Maybe go to a video store and run through the aisles with my arms out knocking all the movies off the shelves (I have always wanted to do that)

or

I could drive AROUND the pylons in a construction zone weaving in and out like a huge dog agility course

or

I could pretend I have Tourrettes syndrome while ordering at a drive thru--- w-wi-wi-win- STUPID CHICKEN!!!!

or

Flash truckers wearing my tassel stripper bra, using the pass on the left,, flash on the right technique (I don't own a tassel stripper bra...damn)

or

Break another jar of Green Olives and fall to my knees caressing the casualties while sobbing--(wait--did that already,, damn squared!)

or

Break out in a belted rendition of Annie's "Tomorrow" in the long lines of the DMV at lunch time

or

Skip through the mall screaming there's no place like a DOME HOME,, there's no place like a DOME HOME (There's not you know, Dome Homes are cool!

or

Go to a sit down restaurant and order water, then after the server brings it,, taste it and with a straight face say "I'm sorry, I asked for a DIET water--this doesn't taste like DIET,, try again!!!"

or

Just go commit myself before someone else does it for me (taking laces off shoes)



What the FRENCH,,,,,,, TOAST!!!????? Best line in a gum commercial you LINT LICKER!!!!


I am sorry for this post,, holding head low...

6 Seducing Deductions:

BamaTrav said...

My favorite color is clear. I am a body trapped inside a mind, I can't get past the fog to get to the forest. I talk in circles and think right the opposite.

Secretia said...

You are a very cool blogger!

Secretia

f1trey said...

OMG....here sit down and eat these circus peanuts.....as I ...... whirl around for your pleasure

Dutch donut girl said...

I wonder what would happen if the internet stopped existing? This blog would vanish into nothing.

It scares me a little bit too.

The Invisible Seductress said...

answering each comment with a random sense of reckless abandon and frivolity...

BamaTrav- Bubble-wrap chair cushions
Secretia- I LOVE applesauce (and thanks,,wink)
Trey- Tightie Whities please
Ddg- And BINGO was his NAME-O

....seriously--you guys rock HUGS!!!

Blogger said...

I've just downloaded iStripper, and now I can watch the sexiest virtual strippers on my taskbar.

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