Think what you will. Judge if you want.This is the sad reality..

This gets personal. This gets real. I hope to still have some respect after I share this with you.

If you feel loved and financially secure, hug your family and thank the stars above tonight!!


I am thankful. Thankful that after months of trying I was offered a job. Very Thankful.

BUT

After being out of work for severe medical issues, having my credit ruined, having the State of Florida come after me for Child Support (because well, you can't take care of kids while in the hospital) and when your Ex DOES take care of them (because he could afford to and was NOT in the hospital), and then he needs Food Stamps, the State comes after the deadbeat mom (me) who because of her health, was out of a job and not able to physically take care of the kids and then is struggling financially (because she's a loser).

But they WERE taken care of by their father (and me). If the situation was in reverse I WOULD HAVE DONE THE SAME FOR HIM IF HE WERE SICK.

But I have no help around here. It's just me, just my income, and I need another surgery (woohoo). I am thankful that now I have a job. Very THANKFUL, I will rock it out,, but listen to this folks: Because the banking industry can't see past the medical collections on my credit report and see that BEFORE my health crashed, I was "A" credit,,, they won't hire me, even with 21 years experience IN BANKING and a proven success record!

So I start out low man on the totem pole (which I am not too proud to do, work is work). I start out at $8.oo an hour and hope for commissions.

I also do not get paid during the training portion.

Here's a rundown of what that looks like:

Working 40+ hours a week

-240.00 Daycare
-245.00 Car
-60.00 Car Insurance
-120.00 Electricity
-55.00 Water/sewage
-55.00 Cell Phone
-29.00 Computer (expendable bye BLOGGER,,,, sniffle)
-375.00 Child Support
-50.00 Court appointed Insurance for girls
-35.00 T.V. (expendable)


1228.00 Monthly income (assuming 4% tax)
- 1264.00 Bills
___________
(-)36.00
+64.00 (add back in expendable non necessity expenses)
______
=$28.00 A month????

Wait!!!!! Where's gas, food, housing, (Oh, yes, my house in foreclosure because I couldn't pay while I was out of work, I get kicked out sometime this year), how about misc items????

Wow, that looks bad!!

With Unemployment

1200.00
-1264.00 Bills
+240.00 Childcare (I'll be home)
+64.00 (add back in expendables)
________
=240.00 A Month + gas savings

AM I LOSING $212.00+ a month for WORKING?????

I WANT TO WORK AND DO THE RIGHT THINGS!!!!!

Unemployment helped me and I am so thankful. It will be stopping in 3 weeks and this was the only job that panned out. How am I supposed to find a place to live and take care of children on $28.00 a month(- gas and misc)?

And paying Child Support for those reasons? I am a great mother, I do not deserve that!!

I give up....

I would make a Happy Hipster Hobo....But what about Traxx? And my girls?

Where is my spark of light at the end of this tunnel?