Thursday, April 14, 2011

This should'nt even BE a post!

Last night I took a journey. It was a short journey. It was a journey of discovery. A trek into the mind of a self proclaimed clutzy girl. A wonderfully insightful rendition of a college slapstick comedy minus the obligatory nudity and well timed farts.

I walked into my bathroom door.

A full on, dead stopped, collision with a door that perfectly blends in with the walls at night. (facepalm)

I never shut this door, but evidently, I did last night before laying down to rest my then un-bruised sweet seductress head to dream about the cast of glee morphing into evil gummy bears and taunting all of the now also morphed American Idol sour patch kid contestants by whipping them with extreme sour straws after sadistically placing them in gummy lifesaver handcuffs and showing them their Swedish Fish (es)... eeeep!

And of course, because I am devoid of sex, David Beckham was there to set the mood with his swanging licourice.

Is that even how you spell licourice? Licorice, lickorish,, I'd spell check but David Beckham's swanging licorice is monopolizing my brain *long sigh* droooooool...

Where was I?

I never realized that my head could actually bounce off a door like a defiant ping pong ball. It rocketed off that cruelly camo'd hollow core door so severely that I was knocked to the ground in a blur of sparkles and bad karma.

I laid there on the cold tile floor rubbing my head and wondering why... Just why?

But, as often happens to me, I was given a moment of wisdom and otherwordly recognition of the universe in a divine realization that I am making you lucky people privvy to.

I realized............

It's....... PEEPS SEASON BABY!!!!!

What were you expecting? Something all phillisophicalistical or sunthin'???


And then, to make this moment on that cold tile, with a throbbing head, stubbed toe and sense of PEEP entitlement even MORE of an epic life changing discovery..(if that's even possible!)..

I added a well timed fart and some obligatory nudity....

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4 Seducing Deductions:

Anonymous said...

omg you will be cleaning up sparkles for months..

oh wait... did you say PEEP SEASON!!!!!

oh yeah baby!!!! said...

Oh dear friend, I'm sorry for your throbbing head. Been there, done that. As proof, I don't remember when. At least David Beckman was there swinging his licorice. Or with his swanging licorice, or liquor-ish? Anyway, he was there. What a way to go out.
Love ya and I hope you're doing well.

mac said...

I think David Beckham should have joined you in the sparkly floor mess.... A real man would have ;-)

Ca88andra said...

David Beckham is probably dreaming of you right now...

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