So--- Holy Hell--- I am addicted to this blog and my wonderful blog family-- Just sayn' up front-- I will not stalk you-- but I think you are all fabulous-- OK-- maybe I'll stalk a few of you-- but in a non-threatening-- girl next door crushing way-- which means I have to wash your car-- bake you chocolate chip and peanut butter cookies-- compliment you every moment on your perfectly wind swept hair--and-- beg my mom to get my braces removed because the braced girls get no play-- I may also show up at your place at awkward times-- looking awkwardly at you-- tilting my head like you were gonna kiss me-- but you don't-- so then I leave-- and-- cry on my favorite stuffed hippo-- and-- realize that now-- I am SO embarrassed-- I don't think I can face you ever again-- and-- that reality-- just makes me even sadder-- so I eat copious amounts of milk dunked Ho-Hos by the light of my computer-- peeling each individual Ho carefully and methodically for maximum Ho Ho enjoyment-- whilst I doodle "I heart you" 10,000 times using a different sparkly pen color for each letter-- but then-- I realize it's really NOT sparkly enough for my taste-- so-- I run down stairs to get Elmer's glue and many glittery things from the craft drawer-- to fix it-- but-- I also find little pink string Pom-Poms that I deduce can be glued on the corners of each page-- because your "I heart you" drawings must be classy and wonderful just in case you ever see them-- and-- if you DID see them-- surely we would laugh together about how stupid you were for not kissing me that day-- and when I show you the pictures I had made of what our children will look like with the combination of our superior genes,, you'll get all happy and Kissy-faced --and-- we can dote on how great it is that we finally found each other and you FINALLY stopped having me arrested-- and-- now that you accepted that I am the best thing that EVER happened to you-- we can live happily ever after whilst the bluebirds eat individually shelled sunflower seeds from our hands -- and-- sing us happy love tunes everyday whilst a rainbow arches over our mansion!!!!!
Our "sample" rainbow
So where do you live again?
I just need the street address so I can Mapquest and Google Earth you,,,, also,,, I am going to need you to "Friend" me on Facebook and change your relationship status to: In a relationship with The Invisible Seductress, I'll post our love pictures right now....
P.s. This post is just trying to be a clever Thank You for all the nice comments and well wishes. I am not, nor have I ever been, a crazy stalker. The Judge has ruled that when I am in stalking mode, I am completely sane and I can not use mental status as a means for a lighter sentence next time.
Please enjoy my new theme song "Hot Mess" by Uncle Kracker...
.....and a little "Jake" for the ladies:
Doctor, Doctor can you save me??
I like my posts a little crazy.....
On an unrelated side note- I have been using the word WHILST a lot lately..What's up with that?
12 Seducing Deductions:
Fayetteville tennessee !
It's a very small town. I'll be easy to find.
I am the one with the bunny slippers sitting in the backyard with balloons tied to my yard chair just in case you want me to find you first. Just shoot out the balloons and I should land safely in your yard. At least that what the instructions on the internet says.
OOps. I got a little flustered from those pics of Jake and made a typo. I'm still panting, but I'll be right over whilst we can stalk Jake together. xolove ya, babe. Robyn
This is a quick plea from a silver surfer - could you lighten the blue print on your black backround? I'm getting awful frown lines trying to read your long and entertaining entries?! LOL!
P.S. The headlines are fine, but the main body text is a trial and tribulation to the eyeballs...
Mac- On my way.....
Cal-I am of impeccable aim. The balloons will be no problem!! And I'll catch ya!! wink
RRG-Yes Jake is looking nice! His eyes..Oh man! What time you coming over to stalk him? xoxoxo
Jinsky- I hope this helps!! Many hugs to you!!!!
You know... I just watched the Great Muppet Movie yesterday with my daughter and Ho Hos are one of my daily cravings that I must fight off.
Talk about a perfect blog post title.
Inferno-that's too funny! I love when that happens!!! :) don't fight the Ho Ho cravings tonight---this MUST be a sign!!!!
I like braces and I don't wear jeans let alone superior jeans... oh genes. Sorry.
OK, I've accepted it---you are the best thing that has happened to me---there, I've said it now---so tilt your head cos I'm gonna kiss you.
Oh, hang on---you're not here---well not yet--
You're gonna have to take a plane, so I'll meet you at the aiport---I hope the Customs Officers don't take the cookies from you.
Oh, can you leave your mom home for now
Nk-I am sure you look great in your genes!!
Clyde-I am so happy you concur!!! muah!!!!!
damn all I just wish I had hair now..... you know.... for the wind thingy...
*pouts*
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Every time you leave a comment, The Seductress gets a tickle!!
giggle, snort....and maybe she pees a little...but it's still cute....really...